Four years ago on this night I was overcome with emotion. I can remember this surreal realization that tomorrow I would become someone's mother...your mother. I could not wrap my head around the fact that one day could change it all. But it did. You did. Change my life. Change my heart. Change the world.
I've loved you since this day...
But I didn't understand the greatness of the love that was to come.
How could my heart have known a love like this?
You are more than I imagined. Better. My dreams of you did not do you justice.
You fill this world with a beauty that was never here before.
So my sweet Sayler, on this night before you wake up as my four year old baby girl I want to tell you that these 4 years have been the greatest of my life. You have taken a life that was black and white and transformed it into technicolor. You have taken a heart that was scarred and wounded from life's battles and healed it. You have shown a cynic how to believe again and magically transformed a glass that was half empty into one that is half full. You live big and because you do...I get to too. Being your Mommy has been the miracle of my life. No written word can convey they love I hold for you deep within me. But when I read these words I think of you:
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart) - E.E. Cummings
Happy 4th Birthday to you my lovely...